To Hold a Wounded Soldier
by LostBerryQueen
Summary: Helena Cain found a way to express her love to Gina after Gina is revealed to be a Cylon. She showed mercy. She changed her mind. She held her after the pain was over. Warning: adult content.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Battlestar Galactica or any of its characters. **

**Chapter One: Torture Me Pleasantly, My Love**

"Tell me it isn't true," Cain's fists were balled as she knelt on the prison floor, digging her nails into her skin, imagining closing them around Shaw's throat for daring to accuse her girlfriend of being a Cylon.

Gina looked away. Cain had tears glistening in her eyes and streaming down her face. She only showed her vulnerability to Gina, and right now that knowledge, that the hard commander was vulnerable to her, was too much to bare. "Its true." Gina looked up and met Cain's eyes. She wanted to at least be honest in her farewell.

Cain's fists slackened. Her whole face slackened. Her tears slowed on her face. "How-" her throat was scratchy and she coughed, cutting off the 'could you'.

Impatience mingled with the wave of sympathy that washed over Gina. She needed to download into her new body, to get out of here. She had shot Cain's men in front of her, and now she could barely deal with Cain's emotional denial over her betrayal. Lying to Cain was tempting, but it wasn't an option, it would only make things worse when Cain finally came to her senses, and Gina wanted this to be as quick as possible.

Gina watched Cain's face begin to harden, to form back into the mask she always wore. Gina knew she needed to act quickly, get this over with. She needed to provoke Cain, but she chose her next words also because she wanted Cain to know the truth. "I know what happened to your sister."

"What?" Cain tilted her head to the side in confusion.

"The Cylon's took her, after you abandoned her."

Cain began to stand up, her tall presence rock hard and intimidating, but also unsteady as she swayed slightly, attempting to loom over Gina.

"I know you abandoned her," Gina said in her soft, but definitely not timid voice. "They tortured her," Gina began to smile, looking into those eyes, knowing Cain's expressions all too well. "They cut off her arms and replaced them with metal."

Cain pulled out her gun and held it to Gina's forehead. They stared into each other's eyes. Soft blue ones meeting hard brown ones.

"Do it," Gina hissed. But it was her mistake, impatience.

Cain was lowering her weapon, shaking her head. "No."

Cain replaced her gun in its holster, and left the room.

Gina looked down in shame. Still wondering if she would have shown the same mercy. She loved Cain, she really did. She didn't want to, but she did. She was loyal to her people though, she thought Cain of all people would understand that, how could Cain not understand that? It had given her reassurance in those moments of doubt, of guilt, when she was manipulating Cain and accidentally falling in love with her, Cain's ruthlessness had assured her that Cain would do the same in her place. Killing her really, would have been merciful. It would have prevented the Cylon's from torturing Cain. But if Shaw hadn't knocked her over, Gina still didn't know if she would have shoot. A tear had rolled out of her eye, and she raised a finger to wipe it away.

The door opened again and Gina took in a sharp in hale of breath. Cain was standing before her again, shoulder's squared, feet slightly apart. Gina was holding her breath, Cain still had that effect on her. That intimidating and simultaneously arousing stance.

Gina began to sense, that something was different this time. Cain was smiling, that small grin. And Shaw was beside her.

Cain told Shaw that Gina was only manipulating them with her human emotions. Cain forced herself to fill her words and heart with anger. She had to, she needed her words to convince her body of the truth, that Gina was a Cylon, a thing, with no more importance than a toaster. Because with Gina on the floor, her face looking so soft, her body so vulnerable, all Cain wanted to do was hold her, pick her up and take her to the softest bed in the universe and hold her, and wipe all her tears away.

She couldn't be weak. If she could replace fear with anger, Cain would have to find a way to replace love with anger too.

Gina couldn't meet her eyes as she continued to speak, she was filled with disgust and, to her surprise, shame.

Cain ordered for Gina to be interrogated. But as Cain turned away, when she looked down, Gina could sense the regret shinning in Cain's eyes, even though she had turned away to conceal them.

~ C~G~C~G~

Gina pulled up the weak gray garment, trying to conceal the blood from Cain. She didn't want those hard eyes looking at her wounds, adding pain to them like more punches and whiplashes, just by the sharpness of their glare.

Cain's eyes greedily took in the sight of Gina's abused body, her puffy eye, arms and legs covered in bruises, back covered in cuts from the whip. Cain seemed satisfied, and began to walk away. Those even strides, those boots those feet tapping the ground, but they seemed to pound against the ground to Gina in her weakened state.

"Kill me," Gina's voice was hoarse, and the volume was low because of her throat, which felt clogged and scratchy.

Cain stopped abruptly though. She could still hear Gina.

"I would have shown, mercy," Gina whispered as loud as she could to Cain's back, which still faced her.

Cain turned around, "You wouldn't have shown anything, you don't know mercy because your feelings aren't real."

"I didn't shoot you. I could have, but I didn't."

"Because you hesitated, you flinched," there was something desperate in Cain's eyes, as if Cain was still trying to protect her, and thus upset that Gina had failed to protect herself.

"But I'm not like you Cain," Gina said slowly, her voice gaining more strength. She could see she was getting somewhere. "I can't abandon my own sister-"

"Don't!" Cain took a step towards her.

"I can't betray my own people, but I can't kill the women I love either."

Cain slapped her across the cheek. The force of the blow nearly knocked the thoughts out of her, but there was something else in the sting too, just to be touched by Cain, filled her with a flutter of happiness, just to be touched by Cain, she missed that, she craved that in the deepest part of her soul.

"You don't feel anything!" Cain slapped her again. "You're a machine!"

Gina looked up slowly from the blow. Gazing into Cain's hard yet angry to the point of verging on tearful eyes. "You can't do it either," Gina said in mild astonishment. "You can't kill the women you love."

Cain's lower lip was shaking. Her hand was raised like she was about to slap Gina again, but then she lowered it, drawing herself up to her full height, about to turn away again.

_No, _Gina thought. She couldn't leave her. Not to the man that was going to come back and torture her again. If she was going to be tortured, she wanted to be tortured pleasantly, by the women she loved.

"Coward," Gina called after her. "You're a coward."

Cain turned back around, and when she did, Gina could see that her hard commander mask was on. She looked at Gina the way she looked at everyone else, and if Gina didn't know her like she did, she would have believed what her expression suggested. "Really?" She asked in a dangerous, higher toned sort of voice. "And what would I do if I were a braver women?"

Gina braced herself for what was coming. "You would torture me yourself."

Cain's mask flickered, for just a second, allowing shock to show through. Then her predatory grin was on, her eyes widened mockingly, and she stalked toward Gina.

Fear shot through Gina's veins, accompanied by arousal.

If Cain was anything like she was in bed, when she tortured people, which Gina suspected she was, then Gina was in for a slow frakking burn in hell. Cain was torturous enough when they were having sex, the way she slowly touched her, with occasional fast strokes, she almost always had her begging before orgasm.

Gina had to do this though. If Cain could just see and feel how much this would hurt her, then maybe the human part of Cain would take mercy on her and kill her.

**Author's Note: I really wanted to write this after watching Razor and wishing they had put more detail into Cain and Gina's relationship. I will probably continue this with a few more chapters, and those might become a bit more AU. Please review, comments are always really helpful, and for anyone wondering about my other story I will still be continuing it soon. :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two **

"Don't you think you've had enough?" Cain whispered. She held the whip in her hands, but she hadn't yet struck.

Gina shook her head, but stopped quickly. Her neck was so stiff and moving it at all hurt. "Barely feel a thing." She said.

Cain let out a loud laugh. Gina must have looked pitiful, her face hurt so much that she could barely come up with a sarcastic smile to accompany her brave words, she only managed a grimace.

Cain looked over the wounds Gina had already sustained. She didn't want to hit her, to cause her more pain. But she couldn't let her emotions rule her. Gina was not a human who could really feel pain, she was just a machine programmed to. The pain of that drove her to raise the whip.

"Who else is a Cylon spy?" Cain said icily.

"I don't know," Gina lied.

The whip lashed through the air, and Gina heard its sound before she felt the pain erupting on her back, the whip smacking open wounds that she had gotten less than a half an hour before from the interrogator. She didn't know if it hurt more because Cain was delivering the blows, or because she was already injured.

"Pity." Cain lashed her again.

Gina's chest heaved as Cain's third, and then fourth blow hit her, and she let out a whimper.

The whip was soaked in blood, and looking over Gina's back, Cain could see that Gina couldn't take much more. The interrogator had done a good job. Tortured her to the point where, really there wasn't much left to be done, to be injured or broken, without really breaking something. Cain lowered the whip. She would have to punish her some other way. That's what this really was. Not an interrogation, but a punishment.

Cain leaned over Gina, hand outstretched to smack her. Then she saw the bruise on her cheek, which had a cut through it, as if she had been punched, then had the skin slit open over the bruise with a knife. She had seen the wound before of course, but hadn't really thought about it until now, with her face so close to Gina's. "I thought I told them not to mess up your pretty face," she reached out a finger and ran it along Gina's chin.

Gina flinched.

That stung. Cain's eyes widened. Gina had never recoiled from her touch before, not even when she had slapped her on the face moments (about ten) before. She traced her finger over the cut and Gina inhaled sharply. Cain felt something else as she touched her, power, a certain sense of control. Cain moved her hand back behind her ear, to her locks of hair, feeling a broken sense of longing as she ran her fingers gently through the now sweaty hair, damp from torture, remembering running her fingers through it when they were in bed together.

Gina was holding her breath. Allowing small amounts of air to escape in small breaths. Her back stung everywhere, her body was bruised, maybe even had some cracked ribs, but when Cain touched her like that it brought all of her attention to it, as if all the nerves in her body dulled and were only brought to life under her hand. She stared down at at Cain's boots. A single tear slid down her cheek.

Cain placed a finger and thumb underneath Gina's chin and gently lifted her face. Gina met her brown eyes, hard, but a tad softer. Cain gently wiped away Gina's tear. "I don't want to hurt you," Cain said genuinely. "I miss you."

Gina inhaled sharply, "I miss you too."

Cain pulled Gina's head onto her shoulder, and wrapped her arms around Gina's shoulders in an embrace, trying to avoid touching the blood.

Gina melted into the strong embrace, and cried onto her shoulder. She was traumatized by the abuse she had faced at the hands of the interrogator, and at the hands of Cain, it was impossible not to seek comfort in her lover's arms, because of the vulnerability that bond triggered. Gina had allowed herself to get far to close to Cain, and this had compromised her mission.

Cain's strong hand held the back of Gina's head firmly. "You understand," Cain said slowly, "That I cannot betray my people. You would understand."

Gina shook her head, despite the fact that moving it hurt. "I wasn't going to kill you, I wouldn't have done it."

Cain hugged her more tightly, but still gently. "Please, just tell me the truth, tell me about the Cylons."

"I will," Gina lied through her tears. Trapped in Cain's embrace she could no longer escape her emotions. She could no longer force herself to wish to download into a new body, to allow herself a chance at love that wasn't doomed by fate. She latched back onto the love she had, she didn't want to love anyone else the way that she loved Cain.

Suddenly both of Cain's hands were in Gina's hair, and she was kissing her. A dominating kiss, she pushed her tongue into Gina's mouth, but Gina pushed back just as desperately.

Cain reached down to tug at the shackles around Gina's feet, but she needed the key.

She broke the kiss, and looked into Gina's eyes with an unspoken promise, stroking her hair. She stood with a slight smirk as she looked down on Gina, then she turned to retrieve the key.

When Cain left the room Gina started shaking. Shaking with desire, shaking with fear. She loved someone who had the power to kill her, someone who did, but wouldn't, someone who wanted to sink their claws into her skin in revenge as much as in pleasure. And yet, somehow, she had never felt more passionately towards Cain, more attracted to her. It was as if the fear of losing her had broken some kind of a dam in her brain, and let loose every single passionate feeling she had managed to stuff away, though of course, she had never been able to banish all thoughts of love for Cain.

It couldn't last though. It had to end in death. If it didn't, it would end a much worse way.


End file.
